Thursday, August 27, 2009

I need romance

Is your idea of romance, just jumping in the sack. Or you do you think, you just don't have a romantic bone in your body. Maybe you have ran out of ideas or need a refesher course. If you feel you need a little kick to jump start your mojo, here are some tips. The list of romantic tips is endless. The internet is lettered with them, but I have done all the research for you and came up with a few, I thought was worth sharing. I know… most of them are corny, but if the works, it’s worth it right? Also, bare in mind there is no subsitutation for creativity.

1. Buy a stylish hand mirror and give it to your partner as a gift. Include a card in the box saying. “In this mirror you will see the image of the most beautiful women in the world.”
2. Call him at work and say: "Hello handsome! Are you free tonight?"
3. Hire a masseuse to give your partner a professional massage at home.
4. Have a pillow fight.
5. Create a music mix of your favorite love songs and get busy
6. Cuddle on the sofa and watch a movie.
7. Walk on the beach in the moonlight.
8. Ask him to pick a number between 1 and 50, then reward him with that number of kisses.
9. Make a habit of taking a stroll after dinner every evening.
10. Make love on top of the washer/dryer (while it's running).
11. Attach a note on the TV remote: "Turn me on istead!"
12. Shower together by candlelight.
13. Get tickets for an event and keep it a secret until the day arrives.
14. Hide a greeting card under your partner's pillow.
15. Slip a little love note into his wallet
16. Give a foot massage
17. Perform a sensual shower in front of him. Or shower together - it's sexy and you'll save water :-)
This last one, reminds me of the time I did a sexy rub down in the bath for my hubby and I totally slipped under the water… we couldn’t stop laughing. Anyway… carry on.
18. While your lover is in the shower, or bath, put their bath towel in a hot dryer for a few minutes.
19. Mail your partner a Calling card with your name and number on it. Write on it: “Your instant resource of love. Call when lonely.”
20. Serve breakfast in bed

If all else fails, keep in mind- Three simple sex rules:

girls are slow, guys are fast...
guys are visual: Show him...
girls are auditory: Tell her...

Thursday, August 6, 2009

How to Build Trust in you Relationship

Have you heard the old saying? "Without trust, there is no love."

So you have come to the realization that the real reason your relationship is failing, is trust. You can trust him as far as you can throw him. You’ve BOTH talk about it and you’re BOTH ready to take the next step. So what do you do? You wonder, how exactly are we going to build trust, when that was the problem in the first place. I think the very first step should be ACCEPTANCE. I’ve never heard of a couple that is identical. Yes, you can have alot in common, but not identical. Accept you partner's short comings and help them work on what they can change. Being different is vital to the successful of a relationship (Creates balance.) These differences when combined, makes a couple stronger than they would be as individuals.

Here are some more tips by Darlene Zagata.

Be honest. If you're ever going to build trust in a relationship you need to be honest. Not only do you need to be honest with your partner, but you also need to be honest with yourself as well. People often pretend to be happy on the surface when in their heart they know they're not. There may be problems in a relationship that one or both partner refuses to acknowledge. They spend their days in denial without confronting the real issues. Being honest with each other and acknowledging issues that need to be addressed can help healing take place and build a stronger relationship.

Keep your word.If you say you're going to do something then do it otherwise don't make promises you can't keep. This applies to all relationship not just those of a romantic nature. If you repeatedly make promises and then break them people, including your significant other may begin to perceive you as not being trustworthy. Try to keep your word in all things and don't make promises if you don't think you can keep them. Yes, there are times when we all have to break an occasional promise but when this happens consistently it gives others the impression that your word is not worth much. Keeping your word and following through will help others to build trust in you.

Respect others.Respect the wishes of others including your romantic partner. Where trust often needs to be earned respect should come naturally. But if you can't give respect you're unlikely to get it and even less likely to be trusted. Even in the best relationship people need privacy or just some time alone. Respect your partner's needs and don't assume that just because he/she needs some time alone that he/she is doing something wrong. Sometimes people just need a little bit of space and there's nothing wrong with that. Don't make assumptions and don't jump to conclusions. Be understanding and your partner as well as others will respect you for it.

Face your fears.People often react the way they do due to inner fears. Fear is usually the motive behind jealousy in romantic relationships. A person fears losing the one he/she loves and so reacts with jealousy. But trust can overcome jealousy. Face your fears. Talk about them with your partner. Once you've faced your fears it becomes easier to release feelings of anxiety and allow trust to build and grow naturally.

Have confidence in yourself.People who have trust issues often have low self-esteem. Learning to be confident and trust in yourself can be the first step to building trust in your relationship.

Know yourself and your needs.Know what it is that you are looking for in a relationship. People often try to fill gaps in their own lives through a relationship when in truth what they feel is missing can only be found in themselves. Knowing what is most important to you in a relationship before you commit to one can provide you with a strong sense of self-reliance which in turn can help prevent trust issues due to insecurity from developing in the first place.

Give yourself and your relationship time.Trust doesn't always come easily. It often needs to be earned. Give yourself and your relationship time to grow and develop and trust will build and grow stronger as well. Trust doesn't happen overnight but it will happen. Give it time.

Forgive and let go. People often carry baggage from past relationship into the present. If they've been hurt or betrayed in the past they may fear the same thing will happen again. He/she may find it difficult to trust the new partner even though that person has given no reason for him/her not to be trusted. In instances such as this the individual who has been hurt must try to move past the hurt and get on with his/her life. You can't judge everyone by the actions of one person. Forgive, let go and move forward with your life. This is the best way to learn to trust again.
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