Friday, May 22, 2009

Quality not Quantity

It’s important for couples to find time for each other. I know with the
hustle and bustle of our everyday life, this is near impossible. Couples raising
a family have the most difficulty finding time for each other. However, you
would be surprise at how a little can go a long way. Sometimes you have to think
outside the box. If money is short or you can’t find a babysitter, try cooking a
meal together. You can send the kids off to bed early and share a movie… Even if
the kids are watching the movie with you, you can cuddle together. Most times the
kids will be too busy watching the movie to pay attention to you cuddling.

In order for any relationship to work and be fulfilling all
aspects or things must be balanced. When you spend time with the one you love
you have a chance to fulfill all of your relationships many needs. For families,
your children will benefit from the time you spend with your spouse!
Mommy and Daddy don't talk to each other or do anything together kids notice.
When there is a silence, a thick stressful atmosphere or a "coldness" in the air
the children can feel it. Silence is an opposite of communication. When couples
don't spend time together there is no chance for communication to occur. A
stressful atmosphere is caused by unsaid words, unshared thoughts, angers,
regrets, unfulfilled needs, wants, and desires...etc. Children feel but don't
understand. The see but don't grasp. The whole family suffers when there is a
stressful, silent, cold atmosphere in the home.

Friday, May 15, 2009

Back up dude!

So the other day my husband and I got into it a little. Here's what happen... this is my first blog. Yes I'm a rookie at blogging for now. My husband is in the IT field...anyone picked up on where this is going... I do value his opinion, so I ask him and a few other friends to check out my updates. I ask my husband mainly to get a man's point of view. So when he got to see it, I was excited to hear what he had to say. So there I go...
Did you read it... well? His reply was "no comment".

Without even thinking my walls went up. He picked up on it and tried to fix it by explaining what he really thought of the blog. But it was too late, everything he said sound like a criticism. We mutually decided to end the conversation until we thought it thru. Later that night we spoke about it and I was able to admit that I became defensive the moment he said the words "no comment". He explained that he used the wrong choice of words. He really just needed more time to think about what his reply was going to be, because he didn't want to say the wrong thing and offend me.

So I'm telling you this little story because many of the things I mentioned in my other posting were at work here. Even though he ended up doing what he hoped to avoid, we were able to fix the problem thru communication and mutual agreement. I also mentioned in another posting that most times men are not malicious unless provoked and most of them are not very good at communicating. So, do you think maybe it time you start talking?

Monday, May 11, 2009

Quotes from Will Smith and Jada Pinkett about Love and Marriage

Whether you approve of Will and Jada’s approach on marriage, you can’t deny that they are making it happen with or without our approval. Here are some quotes from them on love and their marriage.

Will ON THE KEY TO DOMESTIC BLISS: "Really, really good sex. I'm really good at it. (Also) we talk a lot. Sometimes people hear us talking and think we over-talk situations but communication is everything."
JADA: "I will throw my career away before I let it break up our marriage. I made it clear to Will. I'd throw it away completely."
Source: USA Weekend
Will ABOUT JADA: "With Jada I stood up in front of God and my family and said, 'till death us do part'. Divorce cannot be an option ... I honestly believe there is no woman for me but Jada. No-one can handle me the way she does ... Once you feel someone locked in on you, it's no contest. This is it. I can't imagine what anyone else would offer."
Source: East London Advertiser
WILL: "Families are like a business. The key is one person having a vision of what it needs to be and being able to pull everyone together. That's Jada for sure."
Source: USA Weekend
Will ABOUT JADA: "She's someone I can talk to about anything."
Source: Ebony, February 1997, page 57.

Thursday, May 7, 2009

Is it always about you??

Subject: Do I follow my fear or my heart?

Dear Steve,
I met a gentleman about 3 months ago, and we have been enjoying a platonic friendship. Lately, it's become apparent that we are feeling each other on a deeper level and have a strong physical attraction to each other. The other day, during a discussion about herbal supplements vs. prescription drugs, he revealed that he has no choice but to take prescription drugs because he is H.I.V. positive. My heart felt crushed. Do I put the brakes on this growing relationship and try to remain platonic friends or do I follow my heart and take all of the necessary precautions if we become intimate? By the way, I have herpes but failed to tell him about that, because Valtrex has ended my outbreaks.
Thank you, Ms. Coward

My reaction to this letter was just "wow". Here you're in the same boat as he is, but you're really only thinking about yourself. HIV is nothing to sneeze at, but neither is herpes. Let me guess... The PREFECT man would be just that right, perfect even though you're not. His honesty says that he wants you to be aware of his situation and that in itself says that he respects you. You had a great opportunity to be unselfish and you dropped the ball.
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